Saying goodbye...

This past week I had the opportunity to attend a friend's funeral in Utah. I have an entire post that I will put up about my amazing friend, Jennifer, tomorrow, but I found these pictures of the plane ride home and thought it was a perfect setting to say goodbye.

As our plane ascended into this beautiful scene, I was holding Tymber and thinking of life. The life that Jen had, (while battling a cancerous tumor for 13 years) with her husband and boys.

I thought of the life that I have with my love, John, and how we have survived through much smaller roller coasters than hers.

My mind was brought to the first day I was at BYU, and I met so many of those girls that I would call friends for a lifetime. How life is busy, and none of us live near each other, but how my thoughts and oftentimes prayers are drawn to them.

I thought about the kind of mother that I am, and the kind I truly would like to become.

I teared up at the privilege I have to be a mother.

I know that each of us are busy, tired (this one really applies to me right now), and maybe even overwhelmed, but I think we can still strive for greatness.

Strive to be better.

I think this is where we find ourselves "enduring to the end."

But instead of just enduring, we need to find the joy.

Joy in the journey.

A young returned missionary said the most insightful words in a talk this past week which I loved!

He said that there is a difference between happiness and joy. I thought, "really?" Then he proceeded to say that happiness is often fleeting. We are happy for a time, or sad, mad, etc., but joy is what we find in those things that matter most. We can be in the heart of a trial and have all of those other emotions, but still have true joy in the things that we are blessed with.

These are the things that I have. The gospel, a marriage that is better than anything I could have ever dreamed of, children who I love and who (most days) love me, and the joy that comes from knowing who I am and where I am going. Even if that way there is, at times, a challenge.

Jennifer, you will be missed by so many. Your loving husband, who called you a "hottie" in his talk at the funeral :) Your beautiful boys who are both miracles in their own right. Your two sisters who will miss you and Amy every day. Your parents who love you on this side and the next. Your close friends who were only minutes away on that final night. And the rest of us who knew you, loved you, and will miss your smiling face.